ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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