Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
