You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
