We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
