i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
