He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Can you bring me the toilet please
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Randomize
