But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize