hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
