Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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