It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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