Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
