idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
so let's talk penis.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I still have a little drunk in my system
Randomize
