Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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