Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
