I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
be right there i have to get my cape
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
