Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
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