We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
