hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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