so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
