okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
