Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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