I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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