Plan B is the new Plan A
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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