Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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