You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
