My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize