In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
