We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
