and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
