im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
