That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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