those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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