I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
