I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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