We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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