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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  dude do u know what u did last night?

  (1-309): View more from Illinois

  do i wanna know???

  (309): View more from Illinois

  you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...

  Fav 13 2760 745

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"

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• (845): View more from New York

  You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...

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• (559): View more from California

  ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.

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• (850): View more from Florida

  Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.

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