To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize