Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I wish life had little blips of pornography
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize