So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
His nipple licking is glorious
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