If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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