i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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