I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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