worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
