He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Can you bring me the toilet please
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
