were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
