grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
