I just made out with a guy for $7.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Randomize
