At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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