Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
