How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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